Obama Quotes – the funny, the ridiculous, and the downright scary!
“There’s something about August going into September where everybody in Washington gets all wee-weed up. I don’t know what it is. But that’s what happens.”
– Barack Obama, 8/20/09. We don’t know what it is either.
“UPS and FedEx are doing just fine. It’s the Post Office that’s always having problems.”
— Barack Obama, Aug. 11, 2009, attempting to assure the American people that government-run health care will be in their best interest.
“Right now, doctors a lot of times are forced to make decisions based on the fee payment schedule that’s out there. … The doctor may look at the reimbursement system and say to himself, ‘You know what? I make a lot more money if I take this kid’s tonsils out,’”
– demonizing doctors during health care press briefing, 7/24/09
“I think there’s a different quality to what used to be Cominskey Field vs. Wrigley”
- while allegedly comparing the home turf of his beloved Chicago White Sox to that of their cross-town rival Cubs, The Anointed One confuses what used to be Comiskey Park with some other unknown place, 7/14/09.
“…it’s like the Special Olympics or something,”
–President Foot-in-Mouth, discussing his bowling skills (or lack thereof) on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno 3/19/09
“I won”
The President, 1/23/09, in response to GOP complaints regarding the stimulus bill.
“There’s a lot of, uh — I don’t know what the term is in Austrian — wheeling and dealing.”
– Barack Obama, April 2009
“Welcome to Cinco de Cuatro!”
President Obama, intending to greet White House guests (including the Ambassador of Mexico) to a day-before celebration of Cinco de Mayo, 5/4/09
“I didn’t want to get into a Nancy Reagan thing about doing any seances.”
– after saying he had spoken to all living president, The Anointed One completely botches this one. It was actually Hillary Rodham Clinton who was linked to conversations with the dead. Mrs. Reagan was noted for consultations with astrologers. The President-elect apologized to the former First Lady.
“They get bitter, they cling to guns or religion or antipathy to people who aren’t like them or anti-immigrant sentiment or anti-trade sentiment as a way to explain their frustrations.”
– Barack Obama, 4/12/08
“Why can’t I just eat my waffle?”
– Barack Obama, in response to a reporter asking a foreign policy question at a Scranton, PA diner, 4/21/08
“For the first time in my adult lifetime, I am really proud of my country.”
– Michelle Obama, 2/19/08
“Barack Obama is the only person in this race that, that before we can work on our problems, we have to fix our souls. Our souls are broken in this nation.”
–Michelle Obama, February 2008
“Barack Obama will require you to work. He is going to demand that you shed your cynacism. That you put down your divisions. That you come out of your isolation, that you move out of your comfort zones. That you push yourselves to be better. And that you engage. Barack never go back to your lives as usual, uninformed, uninvolved.
– Michelle Obama, February 2008
“It’s wonderful to be back in Oregon. Over the last 15 months, we’ve travelled to every corner of the United States. I’ve now been in 57 states? I think one left to go. Alaska and Hawaii, I was not allowed to go, even though I really wanted to visit, but my staff would not justify it.”
– Barack Obama, 5/10/08
“I had an uncle who was one of the, part of the first American troops to go into Auschwitz and liberate the concentration camps. And the story in our family was, is that when he came home, he just went up into the attic, and he didn’t leave the house for six months.”
– Barack Obama, 5/26/08 (Memorial Day), apparently forgetting that it was the Soviet Union who liberated Auschwitz in January 1945
“Hold on one second, sweetie”
–Barack Obama to WXYZ reporter Peggy Agar, who shouted a question to the Democratic candidate as he toured a Detroit Chrysler plant 5/14/08. Ms. Agar never received a response to her question.
“The point I was making was not that my grandmother harbors any racial animosity, but that she is a typical white person.”
– Barack Obama, responding in an interview about a speech where he referenced his own white grandmother and her racial prejudice, 3/20/08
“Look, I got two daughters – 9 years old and 6 years old. I am going to teach them first about values and morals, but if they make a mistake, I don’t want them punished with a baby.”
– Barack Obama 3/29/08
“In case you missed it, this week, there was a tragedy in Kansas. Ten thousand people died – an entire town destroyed.”
– Barack Obama in May 2007. The actual death toll of said tornado was 12 people.
“Thank you Sioux City…I said it wrong. I’ve been in Iowa for too long. I’m sorry.”
Barack Obama, May 2008, to an audience in Sioux Falls, SD
“There was something stirring across the country because of what happened in Selma, Alabama, because some folks are willing to march across a bridge. So they got together and Barack Obama Jr. was born.”
– Barack Obama, speaking of the Selma march in 1965. Barack Jr. was born in 1961.
“On this Memorial Day, as our nation honors its unbroken line of fallen heroes, and I see many of them in the audience today, our sense of patriotism is particularly strong.”
– Barack Obama, 5/26/08
“Anybody gone into Whole Foods lately and see what they charge for arugula? I mean, they’re charging a lot of money for this stuff.”
– Barack Obama, speaking to Iowa farmers in August 2007
America is ‘Just Downright Mean’
- Michelle Obama, interview in The New Yorker, 3/10/08
“One of the great pleasures of running for president has been, you know, to go to some tiny town in Iowa and you’ve got some guy in overalls and a seed hat say, ‘what do you think about the situation in Burma?’ You know, and you think he is going to ask you about corn — and he asks you about Burma. But that happens all the time.”
– Barack Obama, speaking to a New Hampshire audience in November 2007
“We can’t drive our SUVs and eat as much as we want and keep our homes at 72 degrees at all times…and then expect that all other countries are going to say OK.”
– Barack Obama, speaking to environmentally-conscious voters in Oregon, 5/19/08
…I am absolutely certain that generations from now, we will be able to look back and tell our children that this was the moment when we began to provide care for the sick and good jobs to the jobless; this was the moment when the rise of the oceans began to slow and our planet began to heal…
– Barack Obama, nomination victory speech in St. Paul, MN, 6/3/08
